Wednesday, October 6, 2010

A love letter to turtlenecks

Dear turtlenecks:

I love you.

I know you're not that popular with most of my friends. They consent to wear "mock" turtles, but not the real thing. I, on the other hand, have a whole shelf in my closet dedicated to you.

Yes, turtlenecks, I love you. I love you sleeveless. I love you cable knit. I love you cottony and in all the colors of my wardrobe (which, with the recent addition of 2 yellow shirts, now comprises the whole ROY G BIV spectrum, excluding coral because it makes me look ooky). I even chose a Halloween costume one year just so I could wear a red turtleneck. (Red Fraggle--it was fun).

I adore the way you keep me well covered and still looking stylish. I love the way you keep me toasty warm. I love the way you accentuate the 2.5 miles of neck I have.

Sparkly black turtleneck, you might be my favorite, thought I will admit that Purple ribbed
turtleneck comes in a close second. You have been with me through so many years. You work equally well with slacks and jeans. You are the perfect shirt for me.

So, dear turtlenecks, please don't think that because I moved to the sweltering state of Texas that I have abandoned or forsaken you. I haven't. I am so excited that it is finally below 90° that I will be wearing turtlenecks bi-weekly until the temperature drops below 80°. Then, we'll have weekly wearings.

Of course, as per usual, starting December 1st, regardless of temperature, we will have turtlenecks at least 3 times per week until the end of February. It's the least I can do to make up for the shortened window of opportunity that my home affords me.

Please accept this compromise with the full spirit of devotion with which it is offered.

From the bottom of my heart, and from my clavicle to chin--




beylit said...

I am so glad you can wear these things, for I can not, and have always lamented the fact. I do not have the gloriously long lovely neck you have, and turtlenecks do little for me. They only show off the fact that I have a short neck. They also make me feel like I am choking. Even mock turtlenecks give me this feeling. So you can do my share of turtleneck wearing.

Linnea said...

I will gladly assume turtleneck wearing responsibility for all my friends. Heck, I'd even do it for folks on the street! Bring me your neck warming shirts, sweaters, and stuff! I will wear it!

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